What does a bag of rice and an onion do when they get into a fast car?

They pilaf.

I'll show my way out

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What is a black person’s favorite food?

Fried chicken you racist!

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I wanna make a joke about sodium.

But Na.

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If I don’t eat all of my food, it goes to waste.

If I do eat all of my food, it goes to waist.

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What is irony?

Irony is when something has the chemical symbol Fe.

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My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot.

It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

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You can’t trust atoms…

they make up everything.

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This boy said he was going to hit me with the neck of a guitar….

I said, “Is that a fret?”

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Did you know yesterday was National Middle Child Day?

Don't worry, no one else remembered either.

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Why does Santa have huge SACK?

He comes once a year!

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The Biggest and Best Collection of Funny Jokes on the Internet